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Thoughts of Dog

@dog_feelings3.2M followers

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1Jun 13, '18sometimes. the human presses their noggin against mine. to figure out what i’m thinking. so i just think really hard. about how much i love them. and hope they figure it out2.9×0338k66k1.4k
2Apr 2, '19i wasn’t a good dog today april fools. i was so good2.5×0336k42k493
3Mar 10, '20the human has been working from home the last couple days. and every so often. they let me participate in the video calls. all the other humans cheer when they see me. i am the onl2.5×0312k48k1.2k
4Apr 2, '18today. i wasn’t a very good dog april fools. i was so good2.3×0280k54k234
5Apr 2, '20today. i wasn’t a very good dog april fools. i was so good2.3×0312k34k532
6Jan 27, '18i had a long talk. with my fren. about how to spot. a fake ball throw. the optimal strategy. is to follow the ball. with your eyes. instead of your heart2.1×0243k50k514
7Jan 28, '21you are tough. you are scary. you are a good boy. but also a scary one. if the situation calls for it2.0×0243k41k3k
8Dec 25, '21SOMEONE LEFT A FULL PLATE OF COOKIES. AND A GLASS OF MILK. RIGHT BY THE FIREPLACE FOR ME. I AM NOT KIDDING. WHAT A NIGHT1.9×0278k22k858
9Jan 1, '20the best thing i did. this entire decade. was love you1.8×0226k35k1.3k
10Oct 5, '18the human has only smiled once today. it was when i rolled over. with my feets in the air. and sneezed. it wasn’t on purpose. but they seemed to really enjoy it. so since then. i’v1.7×0225k28k560
11Mar 30, '20there are no rules these days. i didn’t even put my collar on today. just walked around the house naked1.7×0225k26k501
12Dec 25, '18i forgot to tell the human. what i wanted for christmas. but that’s okay. it’s hard to wrap a hug1.6×0202k33k418
13Jun 5, '19i like to leave as much of my hair. around the house as possible. it is my confetti. i am a party1.5×0184k32k843
14Mar 20, '19the human is fast asleep. but i jumped on their bed. and cuddled close. to remind them that i love them. because the nighttime is long. and i’m worried they might forget1.5×0201k24k584
15Apr 1, '22today. i wasn’t a very good dog april fools. i was so good1.5×0221k15k512
16Sep 1, '18every time i get brushed. i have to take my collar off. the human always laughs. and says that i’m naked. but joke’s on them. i’m very confident in my body1.5×0188k30k446
17Nov 13, '18gooooob morning. i helped walk the small neighbor human. to the bus at the end of the street. i tried to get on with them. but was quickly denied. they know that with an education.1.5×0195k25k288
18Jul 21, '18on our walk today. i tried to say hello to a person passing by. but they backed away. and continued on. without so much as a smile. the human later explained. that not everyone is 1.5×0186k27k337
19Apr 1, '21i wasn’t a good dog today april fools. i was so good1.5×0212k16k352
20Mar 31, '19occasionally. the freezer will provide crunch water. this is way better than regular water. because of the crunch1.4×0196k22k456
21Oct 27, '19occasionally during our walks. someone will pass us. and completely ignore my human. but whisper hello to me. i really enjoy this1.4×0196k18k438
22Aug 4, '19i know there’s bad in the world. and it would be silly. to pretend it isn’t there. but for now here’s my leash. and a few licks on your hand. to convince you that one day. we will 1.4×0168k30k620
23May 17, '20surround yourself. with those who would flip your ear back for you. if it ever went inside out1.4×0175k27k626
24May 4, '20if you start leaving the house again. who will be around to say. ohhh big stretch. every time i do a stretch1.4×0183k23k508
25Apr 8, '19gooooob morning. i’m going to need a lot of attention today. i can just tell1.4×0160k30k752
26May 16, '19sometimes. the human needs a break from the world. so i grab my leash. drop it in their hand. and we take a walk. where all we have to focus on. is putting one paw in front of the 1.3×0169k25k548
27Dec 12, '18the human seems distracted. so i put my paw on their knee. and now they know. that whatever it is. we’re in it together1.3×0172k24k368
28May 2, '19i know you have a lot going on right now. so i just want to say. i think you’re doing great1.3×0150k33k527
29Jan 6, '20the human came home today. with a new stuffed fren for me. they called it a koala. and as they knelt down to hand it over. they mentioned it could use. all the love i have right no1.3×0177k20k321
30May 4, '18the human hasn’t smiled much today. and i’m not sure why. but i have a squeaker toy that looks like a cupcake. and i am coming. to the rescue1.3×0165k26k259
31Jan 14, '19i just found out. that not everything is about me. and i’m devastated. to say the least1.3×0157k27k416
32Nov 28, '19there are many humans in the household right now. and they all seem to have snacks. so i’m going to convince each and every one of them. that i have not eaten. in several weeks1.3×0178k19k423
33Apr 4, '19nobody ever told me. when you wake up from a nap. you can immediately start another one. that was something i figured out. all by myself1.3×0173k21k325
34Jan 21, '19sometimes. i'll lean against your leg. and it's not because. i'm afraid to lose my balance. it's just that. i'm afraid to lose you1.3×0168k20k453
35Jun 23, '20personally. i don’t think you should set off fireworks. for any reason ever1.3×0169k20k233
36Dec 10, '19gooooob morning. i know you’ve got a lot going on right now. so i wanted to mention. i think you’re doing great1.2×0151k28k468
37Jan 23, '22THE HUMAN JUST GRABBED THEIR KEYS. AND MY LEASH. THEY ARE PUTTING ON. THEIR OUTSIDE FEET. I DO BELIEVE. IT IS ADVENTURE TIME1.2×0183k11k926
38Jan 3, '19i found a really good stick. but i chewed it too hard. and it broke in half. which was disappointing until i realized. now i have two sticks. today has been. an emotional roller co1.2×0167k19k291
39Mar 22, '19we went to a new park today. and right at the entrance. was a big bucket of tennis balls with a little sign. that the human said was there in memory of a very good dog. who really 1.2×0172k15k322
40Nov 6, '18i took a little trip. to the school down the road. and waited very patiently. as the human checked some boxes. to try and change the world1.2×0151k26k201
41Jun 10, '20it is the human’s first time trying to change the world. and they are exhausted. so while they rest for a little bit. i have stolen their sign. and will trot proudly around the hou1.2×0164k20k443
42Nov 8, '19i would like more frens. so i have made a list of my best qualities. for your consideration 6. am fluffy 1. can jump (and sit) C. sometimes i sneeze i look forward. to hearing from1.2×0167k17k519
43May 8, '19we were at the store today. and i found a stuffed penguin that i really fancied. i tried to carry it out. but was stopped before the exit. i am not a criminal. i just have no money1.2×0166k18k439
44Feb 16, '19i had been asleep several hours. when the human decided to wake me up with a hug. that’s no problem. it’s what i’m here for1.2×0168k17k274
45Oct 21, '19gooooob morning. i am already very tired. so i really think. we should all try again tomorrow1.2×0143k28k358
46Sep 10, '19i may have gotten bigger. but my desire to be held. has remained constant1.2×0155k21k495
47Dec 25, '19gooooob morning. i’m being told. someone came down the chimney last night. this is preposterous. i would’ve lost my mind1.2×0166k18k289
48Jun 9, '19i was told. whenever a square car with sirens passes by. they are on their way to help. so i always howl along. to let everyone know. i’m helping too1.2×0168k16k344
49Mar 2, '19WE ARE AT THE PARK. BUT THE HUMAN SAYS IT’S TIME TO LEAVE. WHICH DOESN’T MAKE SENSE. BECAUSE THEY CAN’T CATCH ME1.2×0165k17k296
50Oct 4, '19if you leave the room i’m in. i will always follow you to the next one. whatever this adventure is. you don’t have to do it alone1.2×0156k20k537
51Apr 22, '19gooooob morning. the human made me a pancake. in the shape of a heart. it tasted similar to a circle pancake. but meant a lot more1.2×0167k16k323
52Jul 28, '18the human went out. to have fun with some frens. they promised they’d be back soon. so i’m not worried at all. and in the meantime. i found an old jacket. that smells like they’re 1.2×0160k18k247
53Jun 19, '19so sorry to interrupt. but i hope all your dreams come true1.2×0141k28k341
54Nov 16, '19at the park today. i noticed the human glancing at another human. so i made my way over. and sat on their foot. forcing my human to come apologize for me. i am a matchmaker1.2×0172k13k448
55Feb 13, '19i will love you. for all eternity. and in return. could you please wipe away my eye boogers1.2×0158k18k351
56Apr 29, '20i have finally narrowed it down. to a few possible reasons. the human is home all the time now 4. can’t stand being away from me c. loves me so much 1. my presence is a gift1.2×0153k20k447
57Nov 9, '18my ball rolled under the couch. and i cannot reach it. the human has been informed of the issue. and reminded. that my problems. are their problems1.2×0156k19k236
58May 30, '19the human worked all day. so we didn’t spend much time together. this upsets them more than anything. because who knows how long any of us have. but they’re here now. and i really 1.2×0155k17k494
59Sep 13, '19i hear a noise. i think it’s the garaGE DOOR. IT IS THE GARAGE DOOR. THE HUMAN IS HOME. AND MY FEETS. THEY ARE A TIPPY TAPPIN1.2×0165k15k421
60Dec 20, '18there is a tree. growing inside the house. it wasn’t here earlier. but it’s here now. the human doesn’t seem concerned. so i think its our family now. he will be my veggie fren. an1.2×0156k19k332
61Jul 4, '22do not start. with those sky booms. i don’t like them. and you don’t deserve them1.1×0155k19k530
62Jul 13, '19sometimes. i’ll pretend i need to tell you a secret. but when you lean in close. i’ll lick your ear instead. i am a master of deception1.1×0158k17k414
63Dec 15, '18the human just came home. smelling like another dog. this isn’t a problem. i’m totally not upset. if anybody needs me. i’ll be over here. wondering what i ever did to deserve this1.1×0152k19k308
64Sep 4, '19i went outside one more time before bed. the human kept calling me. but the stars look so nice right now. if i sit and enjoy them long enough. the human will have no choice. but to1.1×0158k16k493
65Oct 23, '18if your day didn’t go well. that’s perfectly fine. because now you get to dream. and who knows what could happen. i hope i dream i’m a penguin. so i can zoom on my belly1.1×0141k24k433
66Mar 24, '20i decided that today. is bring your human to work day. we stared out the window for hours. and they helped me spot the cars. it was magical1.1×0158k17k280
67May 21, '19to be perfectly clear. i love you1.1×0143k22k597
68Jun 20, '21no thoughts today. only float1.1×0154k17k1.2k
69Jan 1, '19gooooob morning. i was told that this year. is the year of the belly rub. please don’t look that up. you can trust me1.1×0152k18k143
70Mar 5, '19hi. if you would like to cuddle. i certainly wouldn’t oppose1.1×0146k20k447
71Jul 22, '20in case you forgot. i love you1.1×0148k19k475
72May 27, '19gooooob morning. the first time you wake up. could be a mistake. it’s best to fall back to sleep. just to be safe1.1×0145k20k321
73Sep 15, '20i worked. so. hard. to get the squeaker out of that toy. and you just. threw it away1.1×0158k13k405
74Dec 28, '18i was lying on the couch. all snuggled up with the human. when they got up and left the room. it’s like they don’t know. that without attention. i will explode1.1×0148k17k356
75Dec 7, '19i have spent the whole day. watching the human make a gingerbread house. the final touch. was a little icing dog. staring out one of the windows. now it’s a gingerbread home1.1×0154k16k410
76Jun 16, '18the human is hosting a get together this evening. and i am told there will be snacks. so my goal. will be to convince every single guest. that i have not eaten. in several weeks1.1×0142k22k175
77Feb 29, '20it is really cool. that this year. i was given a whole extra day to love you1.1×0145k19k428
78Aug 11, '18the human said. they might make pancakes in the morning. so the faster i fall asleep. the sooner i get a pancake. as you can imagine. it’s hard to snoozle. under so much pressure1.1×0149k17k199
79Mar 11, '19apparently. we lost an entire hour of sleep the other night. which is rude. so to get my revenge. i will be sleeping all day every day. for the rest of the year1.1×0144k19k186
80Sep 13, '18sometimes. i’m inside. and want to go outside. but as soon as the human opens the door. i change my mind. this is not my fault. i am a fluid. yet increasingly complicated soul1.1×0140k20k279
81Mar 20, '20gooooob morning. i think today. i’ll lie on the porch. with my front paws crossed. and let the sun shine on my face through the trees. occasionally i will rollover. so it shines on1.1×0153k14k285
82May 10, '21rest easy Halo1.1×0148k13k801
83Aug 25, '19the small neighbor human. goes back to school tomorrow. so we spent the whole day together. doing our favorite things. i understand education is important. but here’s the thing. so1.1×0152k15k357
84Oct 9, '18exactly one year ago. a package arrived for me. and little did i know. that inside. would be the very best stuffed fren. anyone could ever ask for. happy birthday sebastian1.1×0151k13k191
85Aug 5, '18WE’RE GOING ON A HIKE. AND I’M CARRYING MY TRAVEL BOWL. IN CASE OF THIRST. BUT I HAVE To keep stopping. and looking back. because the human is slow. and i am speedy1.1×0151k14k178
86Sep 7, '20i made a list. of reasons you should hang out with me today 4. i am fun c. i am soft 2. i will listen. to your silly human problems 8. you can pick the snacks a. i love you1.1×0142k17k716
87Nov 7, '20my tail is blurry. and my feets. are a tippy tappin1.1×0145k15k240
88Feb 10, '19there was a sandwich. on the edge of the counter. and now there isn’t. those are all the details. we can confirm so far. the piece of lettuce on my nose. is purely circumstantial1.0×0144k16k236
89Dec 7, '18THE GARAGE DOOR IS OPENING. THE HUMAN IS HOME. THE WEEKEND HAS BEGUN. PLEASE HELP. I CAN’T STOP SPINNING1.0×0148k14k172
90Nov 4, '19the human keeps a picture of me. on the front of their little computer. so they can show everyone they meet. wherever they go. just how beautiful i am1.0×0145k14k289
91Dec 25, '18gooooob morning. there is a box. underneath my tree fren steven. that smells like peanut butter. i am trying my best. to remain calm. but i think it’s for me1.0×0147k14k154
92Apr 20, '19if you see me sitting outside a store. being all good. while my human shops inside. you must come pat my noggin. that’s the law1.0×0149k13k159
93Oct 16, '18one time. i was having a nightmare. and the human noticed. so they held my paw. to make sure i knew. everything was going to be okay1.0×0144k14k194
94Aug 20, '20the human had another video call today. but this time. they put me in front of the screen. gave me their headset. and walked away. it may have been a joke to them. but this is exac1.0×0144k13k346
95Jan 1, '21i heard there is a ball dropping later. does anybody have the details? i am interested in that1.0×0146k11k329
96Dec 21, '19the small neighbor human came over. with an early gift for me. it was a little locket for my collar. and inside was a pebble. they said they picked it up. the first time they went 1.0×0146k10k396
97Jan 13, '19the human went out tonight. and i hope they’re having fun. but i can’t fall asleep. until they’ve returned safe and sound. so for the sake of my snoozle. please hurry home1.0×0142k11k205
98Apr 27, '19WE ARE GOING TO THE BEACH. I CAN SMELL THE OCEAN. I’M GOING TO EAT THE SAND1.0×0144k10k188
99Mar 16, '19we were in the car. stopped at a grey light. when i accidentally dropped my stuffed fren sebastian out the window. the human saved him. and as far as i could tell. nobody in the ca1.0×0142k10k258
100Jul 5, '20i did not get much sleep last night. because of your sky booms. to make up for this. i will be extending all snoozles. by 15 percent. for the rest of the year1.0×0142k10k231

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