| 1 | Feb 2, '19 | hey sorry i didn’t text back 3 months ago. i’ve been farming haha | 10.7× | 0 | 40k | 8.4k | 275 |
| 2 | Oct 1, '19 | vibe check | 8.9× | 0 | 29k | 9.6k | 221 |
| 3 | Apr 18, '16 | *hit by a car* driver: omg are you ok me: kill me next time | 8.2× | 0 | 17k | 14k | 5 |
| 4 | Nov 23, '17 | a little cocaine in the mashed potatoes won't hurt right | 8.0× | 0 | 26k | 8.3k | 10 |
| 5 | Jul 5, '19 | if you’ve had sex pls unfollow me. absolutely disgusting | 6.1× | 0 | 18k | 7.5k | 159 |
| 6 | Jun 15, '18 | good morning where the fuck are the margaritas | 4.9× | 0 | 13k | 6.6k | 58 |
| 7 | Sep 18, '18 | woke up crying haha fuck let's get this money tho | 4.8× | 0 | 15k | 5.3k | 121 |
| 8 | Jan 11, '19 | where the fuck is my horse this is ridiculous | 4.3× | 0 | 14k | 3.4k | 169 |
| 9 | Dec 8, '18 | hey sorry just got done fucking screaming and crying in the mirror haha what's up tho | 3.2× | 0 | 11k | 3.3k | 87 |
| 10 | Aug 8, '18 | people be like "damn you changed".. ya i fucking changed i've been smoking crack | 2.8× | 0 | 9.5k | 2.7k | 92 |
| 11 | Oct 15, '17 | yo that instagram story of you drinking shit vodka listening to cardi b was fucking sick!! haha good shit | 2.6× | 0 | 9.4k | 2.3k | 3 |
| 12 | Apr 12, '20 | should i stare at the ceiling or the floor tonight | 2.5× | 0 | 8.1k | 2.7k | 42 |
| 13 | Sep 24, '18 | can't wait for october so i can shove a whole fucking pumpkin patch farm up my ass | 2.5× | 0 | 7.9k | 2.6k | 56 |
| 14 | Sep 13, '18 | omg can't wait to cuddle up in october with my favorite person, call them a stupid fucking idiot while watching scary movies and fucking smoke crack!! | 2.4× | 0 | 8.6k | 2.2k | 80 |
| 15 | Jul 11, '18 | kiss your girl on the forehead and call her a stupid fucking bitch <3 | 2.4× | 0 | 8.2k | 2.4k | 64 |
| 16 | Jun 10, '19 | four loko in my left hand, divorce papers in my right | 2.4× | 0 | 9.1k | 2k | 70 |
| 17 | Feb 26, '19 | don’t fucking worry about me. i’m farming | 2.4× | 0 | 6.7k | 2.9k | 75 |
| 18 | Oct 1, '18 | it's october and i'm ready for someone to throw entire fucking pumpkins at my face | 2.4× | 0 | 6.7k | 3.1k | 17 |
| 19 | Mar 15, '19 | yo sorry i’ve been busy as fuck! being a fucking stupid idiot! | 2.4× | 0 | 6.5k | 3.1k | 48 |
| 20 | Nov 24, '17 | grandma can you pass me one of those four lokos | 2.4× | 0 | 7.4k | 2.7k | 1 |
| 21 | Mar 16, '18 | that story you posted of you driving listening to music was fucking sick haha nice! | 2.2× | 0 | 6.8k | 2.4k | 22 |
| 22 | Apr 18, '18 | it's not easy being a fucking piece of shit | 2.2× | 0 | 5.7k | 2.9k | 16 |
| 23 | Nov 22, '18 | anyone know how much cocaine we’re supposed to put in the mashed potatoes? | 2.1× | 0 | 7.4k | 2.1k | 32 |
| 24 | Sep 28, '18 | hey sorry just got done having a fucking mental breakdown haha what's up tho | 2.1× | 0 | 6.2k | 2.5k | 63 |
| 25 | Jun 13, '17 | what to say during sex: -you look like a microwave -nice -I wanna die -lmao who did this -no I will not remove my crocs -boomerang this | 2.0× | 0 | 6.1k | 2.3k | 4 |
| 26 | Jun 10, '18 | after 7 shots, 3 four lokos and a handful of crack i am now ready to start my day | 2.0× | 0 | 6.5k | 2k | 33 |
| 27 | Aug 20, '18 | woke up today haha fuck | 1.9× | 0 | 5.4k | 2.5k | 31 |
| 28 | Oct 2, '18 | just another damn day of being a stupid fucking idiotic piece of shit | 1.9× | 0 | 5.3k | 2.4k | 47 |
| 29 | Oct 24, '17 | yo is it just me or what the fuck is going on lmao | 1.9× | 0 | 4.5k | 2.8k | 3 |
| 30 | Dec 20, '18 | been black out drunk in home depot for the past 5 days | 1.8× | 0 | 6.6k | 1.5k | 34 |
| 31 | Feb 13, '20 | woke up without a billion dollars again, this is so fucking stupid | 1.8× | 0 | 5.2k | 2.2k | 32 |
| 32 | Aug 6, '18 | sorry i've been extremely fucking busy being a dumb ass piece of shit!! | 1.8× | 0 | 5k | 2.3k | 24 |
| 33 | Jun 29, '18 | yo what in the fuck is up with everyone being so fucking stupid??????? | 1.8× | 0 | 4.9k | 2.3k | 23 |
| 34 | Apr 4, '17 | bananas in 2017 will now have stories | 1.8× | 0 | 5.3k | 2.1k | 0 |
| 35 | Apr 14, '18 | sorry it took me 3 weeks to text back i was making potato salad | 1.7× | 0 | 5.5k | 2k | 12 |
| 36 | Apr 9, '18 | just got off the phone with soulja boy he said everything will be ok | 1.7× | 0 | 5k | 2.1k | 21 |
| 37 | Feb 2, '20 | a little cocaine in the guacamole doesn’t hurt | 1.7× | 0 | 6.2k | 1.5k | 47 |
| 38 | Oct 24, '19 | another night going to sleep without a billion dollars this is fucking ridiculous | 1.7× | 0 | 4.9k | 2.1k | 42 |
| 39 | Oct 4, '17 | fall weather is finally here which means: - cuddling - shooting heroin - sweater weather - pumpkin spiced ass eating | 1.7× | 0 | 5.5k | 1.7k | 3 |
| 40 | Nov 16, '15 | she calls me daddy in the sheets, and fuckin dumb ass in the streets | 1.6× | 0 | 3.9k | 2.4k | 1 |
| 41 | Aug 22, '18 | finally today is over haha can't wait to be a fucking piece of shit again tomorrow | 1.6× | 0 | 4.6k | 2.1k | 34 |
| 42 | Jul 26, '18 | hey sorry i didn't text you back last week i was at arby's | 1.6× | 0 | 5.1k | 1.7k | 19 |
| 43 | May 18, '20 | sorry i didn’t text back last week i was staring at the ceiling | 1.6× | 0 | 5.1k | 1.7k | 40 |
| 44 | Aug 20, '17 | bro hold my fucking mike's hard lemonade | 1.5× | 0 | 4.5k | 1.8k | 0 |
| 45 | Aug 24, '18 | good morning rise n grind pls pass me the vodka | 1.5× | 0 | 4.2k | 1.9k | 25 |
| 46 | Jul 30, '17 | hey sorry I didn't text back I was blacked out at toys r us | 1.5× | 0 | 4.6k | 1.7k | 0 |
| 47 | Dec 12, '17 | you ever just haha what the fuck | 1.5× | 0 | 3.8k | 2.1k | 1 |
| 48 | Jan 29, '19 | lost my tractor if anyone can help me find it pls my fucking crops are dying | 1.5× | 0 | 4.9k | 1.5k | 29 |
| 49 | May 5, '18 | good morning what the actual fucking got damn shit is fucking going on | 1.5× | 0 | 3.9k | 2k | 31 |
| 50 | Jul 22, '18 | oh shit 3am time to fucking water my hot dog farm | 1.4× | 0 | 4.9k | 1.5k | 29 |
| 51 | Jul 4, '18 | it's 4th of july and that means: - barbecue - riding my horse in the pool - gun powder infused four lokos - watermelon - crack injected hot dogs - arby's catered buffet - going to | 1.4× | 0 | 5.2k | 1.3k | 23 |
| 52 | Dec 26, '18 | if you feel lonely during the holidays just smoke crack! | 1.4× | 0 | 4.7k | 1.5k | 20 |
| 53 | Sep 18, '17 | yo is it just me or am I a huge piece of shit | 1.4× | 0 | 3.6k | 2.1k | 0 |
| 54 | Jul 19, '18 | just got home from being a fucking piece of shit!! who tryna smoke crack | 1.4× | 0 | 4.5k | 1.6k | 27 |
| 55 | Mar 11, '16 | get you a man who can do both | 1.4× | 0 | 3.2k | 2.2k | 1 |
| 56 | Sep 13, '17 | is there a limit to how much bullshit I can be on | 1.4× | 0 | 3.2k | 2.1k | 1 |
| 57 | Nov 15, '17 | sorry I've been extremely busy being a fucking loser | 1.4× | 0 | 3.5k | 2k | 1 |
| 58 | May 28, '18 | ✔️wake up ✔️what the fuck ✔️ok back to sleep | 1.4× | 0 | 4.1k | 1.7k | 7 |
| 59 | Jul 31, '18 | just bought 172 toasters for my pool party this weekend!! dm for address | 1.4× | 0 | 4.4k | 1.5k | 22 |
| 60 | Sep 9, '18 | just got done screaming in the mirror haha what's the move tonight | 1.4× | 0 | 4.1k | 1.6k | 25 |
| 61 | Mar 25, '18 | throwing a mental breakdown party in papa john's dm for address | 1.4× | 0 | 4.2k | 1.5k | 10 |
| 62 | Jan 24, '18 | ok everyone the decision is final and once again i am back on my fucking bullshit | 1.3× | 0 | 3.8k | 1.7k | 2 |
| 63 | Nov 7, '18 | hey sorry i didn't text back i was in prison haha | 1.3× | 0 | 4.6k | 1.3k | 26 |
| 64 | Nov 6, '16 | who the fuck stopped the world from ending in 2012 lmao fuckin dumb ass | 1.3× | 0 | 3.3k | 2k | 0 |
| 65 | Oct 8, '17 | does anyone ever actually even know what the fuck is going on I have no idea what I'm doing | 1.3× | 0 | 3.3k | 1.9k | 0 |
| 66 | May 24, '17 | couple capri suns and I'm blacked tf out | 1.3× | 0 | 3.3k | 1.9k | 1 |
| 67 | Oct 27, '18 | people be like "wtf you changed".. ya i fucking changed i've become an alcoholic | 1.3× | 0 | 4.5k | 1.2k | 44 |
| 68 | Sep 6, '18 | hey sorry i didn't text back last week i was cooking beans | 1.3× | 0 | 3.9k | 1.5k | 26 |
| 69 | Feb 23, '18 | might fuck around and take a shower naked | 1.3× | 0 | 4.2k | 1.4k | 6 |
| 70 | Oct 15, '18 | hey what the fuck | 1.3× | 0 | 3.2k | 1.8k | 12 |
| 71 | Oct 21, '18 | what in the fuck is going on | 1.3× | 0 | 3.2k | 1.8k | 18 |
| 72 | Apr 18, '17 | nudes? lol sorry but I only send bible verses | 1.3× | 0 | 3.2k | 1.8k | 1 |
| 73 | Nov 1, '19 | woke up ugly again this fucking sucks | 1.2× | 0 | 3.6k | 1.5k | 37 |
| 74 | Jul 26, '20 | sorry i haven’t texted back in months i was dead | 1.2× | 0 | 4.1k | 1.2k | 31 |
| 75 | Mar 8, '18 | why is my brain a side of ranch | 1.2× | 0 | 3.3k | 1.5k | 14 |
| 76 | Mar 18, '19 | damn i’m perfect but i also fucking suck! | 1.2× | 0 | 3.5k | 1.4k | 28 |
| 77 | Jul 7, '18 | after 3 margaritas, 5 mimosas and a shot of tequila i am now ready to start my day let's get this money!! | 1.2× | 0 | 4.1k | 1.1k | 24 |
| 78 | May 15, '18 | sorry i ghosted you i've been smoking crack | 1.2× | 0 | 3.6k | 1.3k | 26 |
| 79 | Jul 21, '19 | just another stupid fucking day of not being rich as fuck what the fuck! | 1.2× | 0 | 3.4k | 1.4k | 20 |
| 80 | May 22, '18 | oh shit 2am time to fucking mow my lawn | 1.1× | 0 | 3.8k | 1.1k | 10 |
| 81 | May 8, '19 | text your girl and tell her she’s a fucking stupid dumbass! <3 | 1.1× | 0 | 3.8k | 1.1k | 48 |
| 82 | Apr 15, '19 | we smoking only the best crack today | 1.1× | 0 | 3.4k | 1.3k | 19 |
| 83 | Jun 18, '18 | oh fuck 2am time to fucking yee haw and walk my horse | 1.1× | 0 | 3.6k | 1.2k | 24 |
| 84 | Nov 28, '19 | happy thanksgiving to only me i am thankful for myself thank you | 1.1× | 0 | 3.5k | 1.3k | 16 |
| 85 | Sep 11, '17 | everyone pls pray for me I ain't in florida, I'm just a fucking dumb ass | 1.1× | 0 | 3.3k | 1.3k | 0 |
| 86 | Dec 22, '18 | good morning to only me haha i’m the best you all fucking suck | 1.1× | 0 | 3.3k | 1.3k | 31 |
| 87 | Aug 31, '18 | nothin like a whole bottle of tequila before bed | 1.1× | 0 | 3.4k | 1.2k | 13 |
| 88 | Dec 17, '17 | bitcoin - expensive as hell - consumes massive amounts of energy - inventor of bitcoin is unknown lettuce - cheap as hell - 96% water - invest now | 1.1× | 0 | 3.9k | 911 | 0 |
| 89 | Mar 19, '18 | anyone down to go to prison or something i'm pretty bored | 1.1× | 0 | 3.3k | 1.2k | 4 |
| 90 | Oct 16, '18 | no food in the fridge.. ok margaritas it is | 1.1× | 0 | 3.3k | 1.1k | 17 |
| 91 | Jan 25, '18 | just got done having a mental breakdown in papa john's what the fuck is the move tonight | 1.1× | 0 | 3.4k | 1.1k | 2 |
| 92 | Mar 13, '18 | i might drink some water and sleep haha fuck | 1.0× | 0 | 3.3k | 1.1k | 7 |
| 93 | Dec 24, '19 | lonely during the holidays? try crack | 1.0× | 0 | 3.3k | 1.1k | 13 |
| 94 | Jun 27, '18 | do people actually have sex before marriage haha wtf | 1.0× | 0 | 3.3k | 1.1k | 16 |
| 95 | Nov 22, '17 | if you get black out drunk and pass out at thanksgiving dinner you don't have to talk to your family | 1.0× | 0 | 3.2k | 1k | 0 |
| 96 | Jan 3, '18 | no soulja boy are you fucking kidding me | 1.0× | 0 | 3.4k | 937 | 0 |
| 97 | Aug 10, '18 | fuck you subway!! | 1.0× | 0 | 3.7k | 782 | 9 |
| 98 | Mar 29, '18 | soulja boy if you see this my parents are out of town come over we can drink their alcohol | 0.9× | 0 | 3.2k | 976 | 3 |
| 99 | Nov 3, '17 | just got home from being a piece of shit all day and realized somebody drank all of my mike's hard lemonades this is fucking unbelievable | 0.9× | 0 | 3.2k | 872 | 0 |
@karpathy
@levelsio
@paulg
@naval
@marclou
@illyism