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Corey Quinn

@QuinnyPig108k followers

Chief Cloud Economist and co-founder at Duckbill. Author, Artificial Confidence. Professional skeptic with receipts.

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Across 92 organic posts
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Oct 16
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Posts 92 posts
#DatePost↓ OutlierViewsLikesRepostsBookmarks
1Dec 4, '23My eldest asked if Santa was real, so I taught her about Occam’s razor. “Which is likelier: that Santa is real, or that millions of adults are in a global conspiracy to fool childr87.3×2.6M29k1.7k1.7k
2May 15, '24Yeah, good luck with that Adobe. “That’s an improper use of our trademark; have you considered sounding like a massive tool instead?”66.1×2M19k1k546
3May 16, '24I'm sorry Slack, you're doing fucking WHAT with user DMs, messages, files, etc? I'm positive I'm not reading this correctly.61.4×1.8M7.6k1.2k2.2k
4Nov 17, '23Oof. Sam Altman is out at OpenAI, and the language of the announcement blog post is just "knives out" level of hostility . This has the feel of the company desperately trying to ge52.9×1.6M8.7k609636
5Jul 12, '23I am the greatest Prompt Engineer in the world.48.5×1.5M8.4k632870
6Apr 1, '24Remember: if you really want to screw over a previous employer, leave overwhelmingly *positive* reviews on Glassdoor, mentioning wildly inflated salary and benefits. Insidious, ain42.5×1.3M22k623888
7Dec 5, '23The @awscloud Workspaces Thin Client does more than just "look like" a Fire TV cube...24.7×741k2.8k292263
8Oct 2, '24Google’s doing a great job at fixing their reputation for only hiring the absolute smartest people.21.4×643k2.2k119119
9Sep 2, '24Genius license plate for a Miata: HTTP 507 (“Insufficient Storage”).19.4×582k15k930850
10Aug 4, '23Do not do this. Don't you dare. The one true timezone for databases is always UTC. You get this wrong at your peril and it haunts you forever. Allow me to demonstrate by sending so16.7×500k2.6k250148
11Jan 26, '24“For some reason our AWS bill spikes 4% in February once every four years. I don’t understand why.”13.5×405k2.4k14099
12Nov 21, '23Job hunting tip: When you're putting the job description in all-white text into your resume so the application system flags you as a match, remember to include the phrase "disregar13.4×400k4.6k3511.1k
13Apr 11, '24Good morning to everyone except the thieves at Redis. You didn't build it; you stole it from the community. If you want it from the ones who built it, it's called Valkey.12.5×374k1.8k135242
14Sep 27, '23It really feels like there was a point in time where Slack, Dropbox, G-suite, etc. should have been declared “complete;” every change after that moment has felt like it’s been for 10.6×319k2.3k12898
15Jul 17, '24BREAKING: Google Docs team concedes defeat, acquiesces to doing something customers actually want: fully supporting Markdown10.4×310k4.8k171220
16May 24, '24If you put needless mandatory text fields in forms, you’re wasting my time. I’ll waste yours right back with my usual placeholder text, “[ object Promise ]”.10.1×304k2.4k112318
17Mar 18, '23“We will no longer be allowing remote work,” reads the statement from the San Francisco tech company incorporated in Delaware.9.8×295k2.9k37655
19Feb 18, '23Dollars to donuts this is because the Twilio (or whatever SMS service they use to send the codes out) bill just came in and The World’s Smartest Man® flipped out and said to cut it8.6×258k1.5k15023
20Mar 8, '19I’m continuously amazed by how many people have to ask permission to buy a $50 book, yet are empowered to call a meeting that costs tens of thousands of dollars.8.3×010k2.7k120
21May 30, '24Picked up a new dad trick: Every time I tell my child I'll explain something to her when she's older, I write it down. On her 18th birthday I will painstakingly explain every item 8.1×244k5.9k217422
22Mar 13, '21And now, a small thread on what to do in your first two weeks of starting a new job.7.1×05.1k1.2k2.7k
23Jun 4, '24I hate that this is next-level evergreen tweet territory.6.9×207k4.9k518303
24Feb 11, '23Happy Friday. Enjoy your weekend.6.4×193k2.1k29167
25Aug 11, '23We made it--happy Friday!6.2×185k3.2k375103
26Mar 21, '22Google is so aggressive about mining e-mail receipts for data to sell ads that Amazon no longer tells you what you bought in their emails, and now I honestly can’t tell which compa6.1×09.1k839401
27May 15, '24Alan Moss, Amazon’s VP of Global Ad Sales (and apparently a user-hostile schmuck), appears to have forgotten who Prime Video's customers are. Prime Video costs money. Am I the cust5.7×171k1.7k14083
29Mar 12, '24No notes, Amazon.5.4×161k1.8k142225
32Mar 25, '20I apparently fall into the gap that won't receive a stimulus check because I make more than $99,000 but less than United Airlines.4.9×07.4k93248
33Jan 4, '24If you forget to click the "Log Out" button in your bank's website, it'll log you out after a fixed period of time. If you forget to click "Log Out" in @awscloud's SageMaker Canvas4.7×140k1.7k140104
34Jun 27, '18The secret to getting off of calls you don't want to be on is to hang up in the middle of your own sentence. Only a maniac would hang up on themselves, so you must have gotten disc4.6×05.8k1.3k61
35Jan 10, '21So there's a lot of confusion about what Parler being kicked off of Amazon Web Services (@awscloud) means. Let me do a quick thread to explain it to folks who aren't deep in the te4.5×03.7k1.3k578
36Nov 30, '23Ladies and gentlemen: we got him.4.3×129k2.1k26642
37Apr 10, '24AWS: “What the fuck does that mean?!”4.1×124k2.6k8281
38Sep 12, '24Congratulations to AWS on apparently getting us-west-2 pretty damned close to absolute zero.4.0×120k2.6k86145
39May 30, '24Getting pretty tired of this being almost my entire tech news feed these days.3.8×115k1.9k283150
40Sep 10, '21So an anonymous Twitter person DM'd me this morning with a scenario. "I work at a large cloud company that makes inscrutable naming decisions, and I have an offer elsewhere for 35%3.8×03.1k4991.4k
41Jun 7, '22OH: web1: You are the audience web2: You are the product web3: You are the victim3.7×04.6k1.1k131
42Jun 29, '24It's extremely important that logs never be written to a plaintext file--instead, they should go to a special format that requires a custom binary to read because the systemd autho3.6×108k1.6k8980
44Jun 29, '22BREAKING: AI ethicist warns that Google may produce a self-aware engineer within the next five years.3.4×05.1k53091
45Apr 25, '22Congratulations to Twitter’s new cofounder.3.2×05.2k33439
46Sep 15, '19For every retweet this gets, I will add an Uncomfortable @awscloud Truth to the thread.3.1×01.9k1.5k322
47Mar 25, '20I just don’t understand why Zoom is the de facto videoconferencing solution instead of Google Meet or Hangouts or Duo or Allo or Talk or Hangouts Chat or GTalk or Buzz or Wave or M3.1×04.3k46195
48Jun 3, '22Corporate Infosec sends a phishing test email, I click, and somehow I'm the asshole because "[I] failed the test; had this been real it would have destroyed the company network"? I3.0×04k616115
49Apr 16, '20I was going to build out a hilariously over-complicated & fiendishly expensive Wordpress architecture as a joke, but unfortunately @awscloud beat me to it.3.0×03.3k749254
50Jun 27, '24"No standing, talking, drinking water, using your phone, taking notes, or using the toilet" says the AWS online certification requirements, as Amazon once again mistakes test-taker2.9×86k1.6k120119
51Apr 27, '24“GitHub” is the only thing in this headline from the 21st century.2.8×85k1.8k11547
52Jun 30, '21AWS sees itself as a friend to the open source community / industry. How the industry sees @awscloud:2.8×03.3k771171
53Mar 13, '19*pager goes off* My date: “Ooh, are you a doctor?” PagerDuty: “The autoscaling group lost an instance!!!” Me: “…yes. Yes I am.” Date: “What kind?” Me: “I’m an on-callogist.”2.8×03.7k73328
54Aug 6, '20Ancient sysadmin wisdom: don’t use ‘>’ as part of your shell prompt. You’re one copy/paste error away from truncating a file. There’s a reason root’s ‘#’ prompt gets interpreted2.8×02.8k711358
56Feb 12, '20Myth: Your AWS bill is a function of how many customers you have. Fact: Your AWS bill is a function of how many engineers you have.2.5×03.2k71141
57Nov 4, '22Okay, okay. A thread on why this is a screaming red flag as a Cloud Economist...2.3×02.3k576331
58May 28, '21Sure are an awful lot of tech companies who do location-based pay while also being incorporated in Delaware.2.2×03.2k44453
59Sep 18, '19WHO DID THIS #oow192.2×02.5k69948
60Dec 4, '20Someone (who does not work for Oracle) emailed in to Oracle support today and got this gem in response. If you as a vendor *ever* say something like this to me, I will begin the mi2.2×02.6k46671
61Sep 20, '21It's harder than it looks to free yourself.2.1×03k42167
62Jan 26, '22Me: “I’d like a raise.” Employer: “Nope.” Me: “I’m quitting to go work elsewhere, I’ve already accepted the role.” Employer: “Whoa! Hang on! Here’s a big raise, please stay.” If I 2.1×02.9k186144
63Sep 15, '20There is no talent shortage; people with the skills you're asking for don't want to work for you at the price you're paying with the processes you have.2.0×02.5k56380
64Sep 10, '20Myth: Companies are accelerating their cloud migrations due to COVID19. Fact: Companies are suddenly making better decisions since their executives aren't being exposed to enterpri2.0×02.8k48330
65Mar 28, '22When git was announced as a decentralized way of managing source code, one of the first things that people with Business Problems To Solve did was to centralize it again on GitHub.1.9×02.7k329118
66Mar 30, '22So I've been a *mostly* happy @Ubiquiti customer, despite a few hiccups with their Cloud Key Gen 2+ model space heater. And a security breach. That I first found out about from @br1.9×01.8k470127
67Jul 2, '20Timeless advice.1.8×02.4k46070
68Apr 6, '21Amazon is remarkably consistent as an organization; even @awscloud DynamoDB doesn't support UNIONs.1.8×02.6k32925
69Jan 14, '22If successful, gainfully employed engineers have to "cram" or otherwise prepare in-depth for your technical interview process, your technical interview sucks.1.8×02.5k30079
70Jan 20, '22From@what I can see, getting promoted at a big tech company is roughly four times harder than getting that job at another company.1.7×02.7k15376
71Jul 29, '21Amazon came in almost $2 billion below revenue expectations because you all did your part and turned off your unused EC2 instances. I want you all to know I'm very proud of you.1.7×02.7k21334
72May 17, '18Absolutely do not do this. UTC is the proper server timezone unless you want an incredibly complex problem after you scale. Fixing this specific problem has bought consultants enti1.6×01.8k56722
73Jun 10, '21Good morning, Twitter.1.6×02.4k27429
74Jul 21, '22"Why is @Amazon acquiring @OneMedical bad news?" Let's explore. 1. Horizontal integration at Amazon scale of a company that now has the right to access my medical records under HIP1.6×01.6k463199
75May 16, '22Kubernetes is so easy to use that a company devoted solely to troubleshooting issues with it has raised $67 million.1.6×02.1k35455
76Dec 29, '21I’m not sure who needs to hear it, but “offering someone more money or a better environment to work there” is called “recruiting.” GTFO with this “poaching” narrative. You employ p1.5×02.3k26435
77Mar 16, '22"Here's a container, run it for me." Google Cloud Run: "You got it, boss!" Man, AWS has 17 ways to run containers and they all suck.1.5×02.2k180104
78Oct 3, '21How companies decide to roll out Kubernetes:1.4×02.1k23359
79May 19, '21Welcome to the game, @awscloud App Runner.1.4×02.1k24026
80Oct 19, '20Relationships are hard.1.4×02k26128
81Oct 4, '21Facebook's current outage is one of those rare moments of "maybe the internet is a better place when your site is down."1.4×02.1k25820
82Jun 3, '21Employers shocked to discover that they don’t own people, merely employ them.1.4×01.9k32923
83Jan 30, '20Earnings call in an hour, but AWS came in just shy of $10 billion in revenue for last quarter, most of which because y'all didn't turn off your EC2 instances.1.3×01.7k27920
84Oct 18, '20The Cloud Champion1.3×01.8k22255
85Apr 9, '20Every big tech company eventually writes its own programming language. Google: Go Apple: Swift Facebook: Hack Amazon: CloudFormation1.2×01.8k21931
87Mar 22, '22“Okta knew and didn’t disclose it for months AWS-style” and “Okta didn’t know” are both extremely terrifying.1.2×01.8k18260
88Nov 11, '21There is no cloud, it's just someone else's technical debt.1.2×01.7k22324
89Mar 6, '21"How do I get into DevOps?" Screw that, how do I get the hell *OUT* of DevOps?!1.2×01.8k14320
90Jun 15, '21It’s not “imposter syndrome” if you’re legitimately terrible at your job.1.2×01.7k13819
91Feb 1, '20“YAML is super picky and annoying!” snivels an entire generation who never had to touch a BIND zone file.1.1×01.6k2025
92Nov 19, '21Sometimes an engineer will get their company to open source a project. Then there will be a couple of commits and it's never touched again. That engineer just passed their work to 1.1×01.7k10078
93Jan 5, '22Git was decentralized too, and the first thing we did with it was centralize on GitHub.1.1×01.6k14551
94Sep 29, '20Welcome to the world, Josephine Ivy Quinn. aka The Josephoenix, JoJo, Josie, Jivy, Josephine (rhymes with "Persephone"), JQ, JQuinny, Sephie, Fee-Fee, Joey, and doubtless many more1.1×01.7k82
95Apr 1, '22Amazon is mandating a shift to migrate off of Aurora / all other relational databases and over to to DynamoDB, because it doesn't support UNIONs.1.1×01.6k12921
97Nov 14, '20Just looked at my @awscloud bill, and I refuse to accept the results. Widespread fraud.1.0×01.6k11911
98Jun 9, '21My daughter promised she'd feed the dog, didn't do it, and countered with "I didn't say WHEN I'd do it" so she's apparently JavaScript.1.0×01.7k869
99Aug 7, '17Now that I'm the father of a little girl... ...my perspective on women hasn't changed because I wasn't a garbage human in the first place.0.9×01.4k2020
100Jun 13, '22I used to visit @reddit a lot more before they started pulling this shit.0.9×01.5k3910

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